top three [10.18.2015]

did I go to NYC just for the food? maybe. 

on the internet

• The quintessential cool girl outfit, on one of the cutest bloggers.
• You can buy bow ties now? I'm all for it - thanks for the tip, AJ!
• One of my favorite bloggers shares how you can make one of my favorite drinks. I personally only ever order them at the Old Fashioned back home (obviously), but now I'm tempted to make my own (since I'm 500 miles away from Madison).

spotted

• We all know that I have a bit of a scarf obsession. In an effort to buy higher quality items, I'm limiting myself to just a few new scarves over the next six months of winter. I currently have my eye on this beautiful wool/cashmere wrap. It looks so soft and thick enough to be warm. I'm debating between the grey and the tan and just can't decide!
• I think I've finally found the perfect distressed black jeans, and with today's sale, they are under $20!
• How freaking cute are these plaid flats from J.Crew Factory?! Perfect for the holiday season (and because they aren't so PLAID IN YOUR FACE, the rest of the winter too!)

on franish

• on the blog: I loved everyone's thoughts on what being an "in-betweener" is like. You guys are amazing!
• on the instagram: Hansi really loves fall...and the treat right above my phone camera ;)
• on the twitter: only one level of separation between me and a movie star. but many many dress sizes. 

notable sales

• Anthro: 20% off (code: FALLFUN)
• This faux wrap dress would be great for work and play. The color is versatile, the fabric is comfy, and if you want to get the blue version, you can look just Kate Middleton! ;)
• While it's not my typical cut of blouse I usually buy, I kind of love this skirted top. It would look so good with skinny pants and cute pumps. 
• Speaking of cute tops, this lace tee and jeans would be like my ideal outfit. 
• Kate Spade: 25% off (code: INDULGE) all picks below are from the sales section!
• I have wanted a red crossbody bag for so long - the small ella purse seems to be exactly what I've been looking for!
• Not what I would normally go for in a wallet, but the floral design on this wallet is just so pretty and unique that I'd definitely be tempted. 
• Their medium harmony tote is the perfect work bag, and now under $150. 
• Shopbop: new additions to sale
• BB Dakota is quickly becoming my favorite brand from Shopbop. Their designs are always flattering, and appropriate for most life styles. Their Leigh dress, now under $75, is both unique and wearable. I can't decide between the white and black version!
• I went into a Splendid store this past week, and fell in love with literally everything. Their suede booties that are now on sale are especially cute. 
• Of course their monogram watch no longer has an F available :( Good thing they have an H ;)
• Y'all know I love emojis, so these jewels are right up my alley. I need that sunglasses necklace.

personal

• This week, I got to meet two of my absolute favorite bloggers: Krista from Covering the Bases and Grace from The Stripe. I met up with Krista on a quick coffee break, and honestly, I think we could have chatted all day (and night!) long. She is just as funny and genuine in real life as she is on her youtube videos, and even prettier (seriously, her skin is amazing). I met up with Grace on two occasions, and guys - she's the cutest person I may have ever met. She's so sweet, easy to talk to, and is a wealth of knowledge. They both gave me a new vigor for blogging and a few new ideas for things to try. 
• Throughout the year, I put a bit of every blogging "paycheck" away to buy myself something for my birthday. While I love luxury goods, I always have to save up to add them to my closet, and I find this method a great way to treat myself once a year (previous purchases included my Burberry coat two years ago, and my Tory Burch flats last year). I finally found this year's present - it's this Mulberry doctor style bag, via eBay. I can hardly wait! I have loved this bag for years and years, and I'm excited to finally own my own version. Thank God for eBay! :)
• Today is the last day of my vacation. While I'm obviously going to miss all this traveling and free time, I'm also ready to get back to having a normal routine. For the next month, I'll be on pysch. It should be a really interesting month, and hopefully a very educational one as well. For those of you have already had it/taken the shelf - any tips on books or websites to use to study? I feel like I'm starting at 0 here!

being an average sized girl in a non-average sized online world

"Since you're an unconventional size in blogging, where do you find the confidence to post your outfits online?"

"I'm so glad you're not a twig!"

"She most definitely is not a size 8. I'm a size 8, and no way do my thighs look that big"

"She looks nice, despite that she's large"

These are all comments I've received or read over the last few months.

Some of you may have found my blog through a reddit thread looking for not skinny and not plus-sized bloggers - it's one of my highest referring sites since I started this blog almost four years ago. If you read through those comments, you may notice that there aren't a lot blogs with larger followings written by an average sized girl - girls size 6-14 who aren't basically fashion models, and aren't plus sized either. The in-betweeners is what a recent article called us.

I bet you could name ten bloggers off the top of your head who are a size 00-2, or who identify themselves as being plus sized. Both these categories in fashion and fashion blogging are popular, for different reasons.

On the one hand you have the model-sized girls. The ladies who look good in everything, the ones who get dozens of #goals comments every time they instagram their thigh gap, and the ones who sell off the shoulder top after off the shoulder top, because their readers want to look just like that, and maybe if they buy that top, they too will look good as the size 2 blogger. They are aspirational, they are what we want our bodies to look like, and it's how we want clothes to look on us. They are re-pinned, re-grammed, and re-tweeted. Companies want to work with them, readers want to be them.

On the other hand, you have the plus-sized community. They have a term, they have hashtags, they have whole clothing lines. There's a true sense of community and support, something that those without a label or a hashtag don't have. There are articles written about them, they get magazine covers, and the girls who are also plus sized identify with them.

And then you have the inbetweeners. We're average sized. We may struggle a bit more in finding clothes to look the way we want because they aren't always cut for shoulders/mid section/thighs. We are neither truly aspirational, nor have a set community that we are a part of. We just...exist.

I'm asked quite a bit about how I find confidence about feeling good about myself. And honestly, maybe I'm just good at pretending on the internet. In every picture I see of myself, I immediately look to see how chubby I look in the picture. Are my cheeks looking especially round today? Does my small mouth emphasize my larger face? How broad and round do my shoulders look? It's exhausting, and it's relentless. The other day, my friend Lizzi left me a comment saying that we probably are all harder on ourselves than others are, and that's totally true. In pictures where I see my small eyes and large cheeks, you may see a happy person loving the best vacation they've ever been on. I see round arms, you may see a dress you wish you also owned. I see a thicker waist, you see someone having a good hair day. Who knows. What I fixate on is probably not what you see, but it's a hard habit to un-learn. So yeah, I guess I don't really ever talk about having body issues, but it definitely doesn't mean they don't exist.

To be honest with you, it is hard sometimes to put myself out there. Clothes just don't look as good on a size 10 girl as they do on a size 2 (or so we are told!) Add the fact that I'm also several inches taller than the average height, and it sometimes just makes me think "good enough" about clothes instead of "good". I have clothes that I need to get rid of because they don't fit me the way they should - keeping and wear them is doing a disservice to both myself, and people who read and recommend my blog.

So. Why am I telling you all this? Because I want to let you know that if you too are an in-betweener, and don't always know how to dress or aren't always happy with your body, you aren't alone. While most of us probably don't air our dirty self-conscious laundry on the internet on a daily basis, I'm sure we all have an issue or two about the way we look, but it shouldn't constantly limit what we do, love, and wear.

It's also to get my ass in a gear and stop feeling sorry for myself. I want to see a picture of an outfit I adore (for example, this layered look on Kimberly the other day), and instead of my first thought being "of course it looks great on her small body, it would look ridiculous on me", I want my thought to be "I can't wait to recreate this and make it work on me!". Because what is stopping me from trying out a nice look I love besides my own stupid insecurities? I want to wear a big comfy sweater, and not have my first thought be "but will this draw attention to my chubby face?" or try on some amazing above the knee boots and not think "but what about my thicker thighs?".

I've never campaigned to the be poster girl for the larger average sized girl, but somehow I have become the one that is recommended that way across the internet. And you know, I feel like I have a certain responsibility to show that you can dress nice when you aren't sample sized. It's something I've been working on for years, and still need to work on. I feel a responsibility to find better fitting clothes, to find a way to layer without adding bulk, to show that the average sized girl wearing her average mall clothes can still look nice for her average middle America life.

Not "nice, despite being large", just "nice".

souvenirs

Growing up, I used to be really into collecting picture frames from different places I went to. And by "really into", I mean I have four picture frames with pictures in them. Now that I'm a bit older, and more likely to throw out cheap picture frames, I buy different souvenirs. A scarf from Germany, or a lipstick from a new city. My souvenir from Greece was this pair of sandals my sister and I found in an alleyway shop in Oia. Both my sister and I got a pair, and ended up going back to get another pair for our youngest sister. I just love them, and love them even more because they will always remind me of this trip :)

What are your favorite kind of souvenirs? My mom collects sand from every beach she goes to, and keeps them in little jars! I guess I just collect accessories ;)

Tee: Boden [exact]

Shorts: Banana Republic

Bag: Sole Society [exact]

Shoes: purchased in Greece [splurge similar]

Bracelet: c/o Rocksbox [use code franishxoxo for 1 free month!]

Sunglasses: Ray Ban [exact]

via instagram

On a different note, today starts the day of Shopbop's Friends and Family sale! They are offering 25% off almost all merchandise. It's only going on for the next three days, so if you've had your eye on anything, now's the time. Use code INTHEFAM25!

one | two | three

four | five | six

top three [10.11.2015]

sunset, sunset, sunset :)

on the internet

• I never thought I needed a pleated faux leather skirt in my life, but Kendi's 3 ways make me want to start looking. Do you think it could work with a white coat too? ;)
• Kaity is one of my favorites - she's a second year med student who is cute as a button and just seems like an all around wonderful person. Doesn't she look adorable in this recent post?
• Nicole proves that all it takes for an outfit to be a stunner is cute accessories. Copying this outfit immediately. 

spotted

• Dalmatian print ballet flats have been on my wishlist forever. I kinda love the more bold version that these Anna Baiguera flats have!
• I love that this cluster necklace from J.Crew carries a serious punch, but because it comes in one color, it can also be a bit understated. Lets all hope it goes on sale soon!
• I have a bit of a jacket/coat obsession (I suppose that happens when you live in freezing temperatures for half of the year!). I love this unique leopard coat - its dark colors keep it from being too bold, but is still unique from the black/grey coats I mostly own.

on franish

• on the blog: gingham, all day every day
• on the instagram: my souvenir from my trip!
• on the twitter: now get off my lawn!

notable sales

• Ann Taylor: 40% off
• This chunky sweater would be a perfect layering sweater. I love the longer back hem!
• Another cute take on the "layered for you" top - perfect for you ladies who will still have warmer weather for a while!
• Bonus: 60% off sale items. Go for that open cardigan that I still haven't found in stores. It looks so comfy.
• J.Crew Factory: 50% off everything!
• A sequined trimmed shirt - when you want to be fancy, but still comfy ;)
• This double breasted cardigan could probably look a little grandma, but I think it would look amazing with some distressed jeans and booties. Has anyone tried it? 
• This sleeved lace dress is the only dress you need in your closet. It's perfect for every occasion, from work to a date to a wedding..and even a funeral if you unfortunately have to attend one. 
• Madewell: 30% off fall essentials
• My favorite style of jeans, in a pretty bright blue
• The most classic looking boot, now in extended calf sizing!
• This worn-in chambray top looks so darn comfortable. 

personal

• I returned from Greece on Thursday, and leave for NYC tomorrow! With only one vacation block between July 2014 and January 2017, I really tried to make the most out of this time I have now. I'm staying with my good friend Ben, and plan on doing lots of exploring. Do you have any recommendations on things to do/see/eat? I'd love to hear them! 
• Yesterday CR surprised me with a day-date! We went apple picking, had apple cider donuts, had the best lunch along a river, and then made a homemade apple pie. He's a keeper :)
• I know I've been a little MIA lately around these parts. It's been a combo of pictures not working out, not feeling the hottest currently, and being a bit bored with my current wardrobe. I've never tried to force this blogging thing, and so while I'm in a bit of a slump currently, I hope to find the spark again soon. In the meantime, is there something that you wish I did more of here on the blog? I'd love any suggestions!

santorini [through the lens of my iphone]

While I own two very nice cameras (a Sony DSLR and a Samsung point and shoot), my iPhone camera is my go-to camera. Combined with the fact that I feel more knowledgeable with my phone picture editing capabilities than I do on my computer, I thought I'd share a bit more about our trip based on the pictures you may have seen on instagram.

Packing / Traveling: 
My old Walmart suitcase has seen better days, so I took this trip as an opportunity to finally upgrade. I spent a lot of time on googling suitcases, and fell in love with the Delsey cream/cognac model. Once I saw the inside, I was sold. I own the 28 inch model, which seems to be the typical suitcase size. I love the two separate compartments, the rich red inside, the easy locking mechanism on the outside, and how it looks with my other traveling accessories (what, it's important!). Of course, because it is a lighter color, it is more prone to get a bit dingy after it is handled by the airline, but I found a quick scrub with a magic eraser takes care of almost all of it! Also worth noting is that I purchased one of those portable luggage scales - I got mine on Amazon for under $10, and found that it is only about half a pound off from what the airline said it weighed. Definitely worth the price if you plan on flying on a cheaper airline with a lower maximum luggage allowance, like we did to fly from Hamburg to Santorini.

In addition to my suitcase, I also finally purchased a passport cover. As a permanent US resident, my greencard is the most important piece of documentation that I own. Losing it would cause so much stress (as my younger sister found out 15 years ago), so I've wanted a way to make sure the card and my passport stayed together. In the past, I was just neurotic about checking ever 15 seconds to make sure it was still tucked between the pages. This passport cover from GiGi New York not only holds my greencard in place next to my passport, but it's also monogrammed. A bit pricey for sure, but I'm just in love with both it, and the fact that greencard is less likely to go missing!

On the airplane, I wore my comfiest jeans, sneakers, and my new faux-layered top from Loft. I brought along my new Old Navy coat, an old blanket scarf, and my trusty Madewell tote. I was comfortable, but felt a little bit more pulled together than if I had worn leggings and a sweatshirt.

What I Wore:
Like I mentioned earlier this week, although I didn't plan on my vacation becoming a work trip for blogging, I did want to bring along some cute clothes. Dresses on vacation are such a life saver because you look cute and pulled together, but with minimal effort. Besides my gingham dress, I really loved wearing my new J.Crew Factory dress (that is now on sale!). I found it to be comfortable, flattering, and easy to walk in. As you can see, I also used my new Sole Society bag every day - it was the perfect size for holding my camera, my wallet, and souvenirs!

I generally don't plan outfits ahead of time for traveling (I really should though!), but I brought the following with me for our 12 days of traveling: 5 dresses, 2 pairs of pants, 2 pairs of shorts, 4 t-shirts, 3 blouses, 2 sweaters, 1 pair of birks, 2 pairs of sandals, one pair of flats, and my crossbody bag.

As a side note, I carry a wrinkle releasing spray with me whenever I travel. While not the same as using an iron, it does a great job of removing some of the bigger wrinkles acquired through being stuffed into a suitcase. I generally use it on the clothes once at night, and then again the next morning. I bought mine in the travel sized products section at Target!

Where We Stayed:
This was a family vacation, so our accommodations were a bit fancier than I am used to! We stayed at the Cliff Side Suites in Firostefani.  My parents were generous enough to pay for the room that my sister and I shared, and it was honestly the loveliest place I've ever stayed in. Every room overlooks the sea, the breakfast every morning was delicious, and the staff was kind and so helpful. Of course, going with a hotel is not the only option. Tamara and her husband rented a cute little place in Oia that had the perfect little deck to watch the sunset. You can read more about her experience in her post here. In the end, staying at the Cliff Side Suites was a really wonderful experience, and if I were ever to come back to Santorini, it would be at the top of my list of places to stay!



What We Did:
We were in Santorini from Wednesday night-Wednesday night, and we tried to do as little, and as much as possible at the same time. Because our hotel was so nice, and I'm in a family of sun worshippers, we spent quite a bit of time just lounging outside, taking in the views, and relaxing. We mixed that up by trying to see as much of the island as possible! We rented a car for the week, and used it most days. We were staying in Firostefani, which is on the coast about in the middle of the island, and that put us in a good place to see both sides of the island. Here are a few more details of what we did:

Scuba Diving: My father, my sister, and I are all all scuba certified. My dad has gone on diving trips all over the world, while my sister and I are a bit less experienced (I haven't gone diving since 2009). We went through the Volcano Dive Center, and it was such a fun experience. We did two dives - one along a wall next to the volcano, and one by a reef. While we didn't see a ton of wildlife (although we did see a starfish), it really was more just about the experience of being under water. Here's a picture of me and my dad - don't I look like I know what I'm doing? ;)

Walking to the Red Beach: There are tons of beaches along the island, and while they aren't the typical "white sand beaches" you'd think of, they are unique and beautiful. The Red Beach is one of the more famous of these beaches. We choose to drive near it, and do the trek around the rocks to reach it, but you can also go on boat taxis to go between the three larger beaches. I thought this was a fun way to get a bit of exercise in while still getting to spend some time on a beach!

Eating! Obviously, my favorite part. Breakfast was included at our hotel, so we were on our own for the other meals. Trip Advisor was a big help in finding places to try, but honestly, half the time we just stopped at places that looked good. Highlights included Floga when we went to dinner with Tamara (I had an amazing ravioli I'm still dreaming about), as well as getting gelato at Lolita's (I got the more traditional strawberry + hazelnut, while my sister got rosewater with pink pepper!). We also had tzatziki at every restaurant we went to - so so good!

Sea Cruise: This is one of those activities that everyone recommends doing while on the island, and I completely agree! We were debating between a day cruise versus a sunset cruise, and ended up going with a daytime cruise with Santorini Sailing. We spent six hours in the boat, drinking, meeting new people, learning how to make traditional tzatziki, went swimming in several different locations (including the hot springs), and had a full multi-course lunch. Definitely one of the highlights of the trip!

Exploring: We all spent a lot of time exploring the different cities on the island - comfortable shoes were definitely necessary! We stopped at wineries, hiked up to old light houses, and explored the less traveled areas.

Pictures: Santorini is one of the most picturesque places I have been to, and I tried to capture those memories as best as I could. Highlights included all the white + blue buildings, the amazing sunsets, and all of the cats!

I hope you enjoyed the mini-recap of our trip. I'm headed to NYC on Monday, so feel free to follow along on instagram and snapchat (@fhasselhof)!

gingham in santorini

Now that our vacation is almost over (today was our last full day!), I figured it was time to share just a few pictures! While my goal on this trip was never to turn it into a daily blog photo shoot, how could I not take advantage of the beautiful backdrop? This was one of my absolute favorite outfits on the trip - it's so simple, but I just love it. If you told me I could have only packed one outfit, this would have been it. Luckily I was allowed to bring 20 kilos, so I still had options ;)

Dress: Loft [save | splurge]

Belt: Gap [super cute similar on sale]

Shoes: Jack Rogers [exact]

Sunglasses: Forever 21

via instagram 

top three [10.04.2015]

just a few pictures so far (more on instagram!)

on the internet

• Looking for practical/comfortable shoes to wear to work? Laura did all the dirty work for you (which is good, because once I start my next rotation, I'm in dress clothes for five months straight). My favorite pair of shoes when in scrubs are these Birkenstock clogs. I tried loving Danskos, but the Birks definitely saved my feet during my OB rotation. I'm never going back (although the Danskos are much cuter). 
• I have really loved watching Lauren grow up over the past two years - both in her style, and in her life. I think we all need to take more chances :)
• Ashley is seriously one of the prettiest people I've seen. Do you think I can pull of purple hair too?!

spotted

• I'm going on my fourth year of wearing my Hunter boots, and while you really only need one pair of rainboots (I have the green pair), it isn't going to stop me from dreaming about this new blush-colored pair. Wouldn't they look so pretty in the snow?
• Has anyone tried the new trouser pants from Old Navy? The camel pair looks especially cute! 
• This vibrant skirt makes me want to skip right past November and head into the middle of December (Christmas > Thanksgiving). 

on franish

• on the blog: sharing this month's (very cohesive) budget 
• on the instagram: just casually hanging out ;)
• on the twitter: scarves just unite a whole country, ya know? 

notable sales

• Ann Taylor: 50% off tops and sweaters
• I'm in love with this v-neck tunic - I love the color, the idea of how comfy it would be, and how versatile!
• Their pretty piped blouse would be great for those mornings you want to look nice but not put a lot of effort in, since it's so pretty on it's own you don't need any accessories. 
• I don't know if I can pull of a poncho, but a part of me wants to try. 
• Bloomingdales: 25% off everything
• If you've had your eye on any Michael Kors watches, now would be the time! My favorite is their two-toned version (it's very Rolex without the price tag). 
• I've always loved the MbMJ Hobo - the red version is now on sale, plus an additional 25%
• While I absolutely love my black DvF wrap dress, this fun lip version makes much more of an impact. 
• Gap: 40% off (code: NEW)
• For almost half the price of the J.Crew version, I'm going to have to try on their version of the red plaid boyfriend shirt. 
• A toggle coat is on the top of my winter wishlist. I love the Gap version - it just looks so warm!
• I have a feeling me and this chunky cardigan could become best of friends. 

personal

• Greetings from Greece! We arrived on the beautiful island of Santorini on Wednesday, and haven't stopped taking pictures since. It is absolutely beautiful here! We have gone on hikes, gone swimming (kind of...), and have religiously watched every sunset. It's going to be hard to leave in a few days!
• As it turns out, Tamara from Hello Framboise, and her husband are also on vacation here, so we met up! She is just as cute as she is on her blog, and even sweeter. They invited me and my family to their rented home to watch the sunset from their perfectly situated deck, and then we went to the most delicious dinner. I love how blogging brings the most interesting people into my life. If you aren't already following her blog and instagram, you should! Not only does she have great style, but she also has the cutest dog (dachshund love brings people together). 
• Between a month of long days on the L&D floor with little time to cook healthy meals, and now vacation, I feel I've slipped a bit on healthier eating. I'm really looking forward to normal meals and an exercise routine when I get back. Do you have any fun recipes you've tried lately? I'd love to add something new to our chili/chicken/salad routine!